Q: What is Kaddish?
Kaddish (קַדִּישׁ) is an Aramaic prayer of praise to God, recited by mourners at daily prayer services. Paradoxically, Kaddish contains no mention of death, loss, or grief. It is entirely a declaration of God's greatness and sanctity.
*Yitgadal v'yitkadash sh'mei raba...*
"May His great Name be exalted and sanctified..."
Jewish tradition holds that when a mourner publicly praises God in the midst of their grief, it elevates the soul of the deceased and brings comfort to the living.
Q: Who says Kaddish?
Kaddish is traditionally recited by:
- A son of the deceased
- In many communities today, daughters may also recite Kaddish
- Any immediate family member — spouse, sibling, child, parent
- A designated individual hired or appointed by a family with no surviving children
The requirement to say Kaddish has been a driving force behind communities ensuring a minyan at shiva houses throughout the mourning period.
Q: When is Kaddish recited?
Kaddish is said at three daily prayer services:
- Shacharis (morning prayer)
- Mincha (afternoon prayer)
- Maariv (evening prayer)
Kaddish requires a minyan — a quorum of at least ten Jewish adults. This is why ensuring a minyan at the shiva house is such an important act of chesed for the community.
Q: How long is Kaddish said?
- For a parent: Eleven months from the date of passing (Jewish tradition holds that judgment in the afterlife takes at most twelve months; stopping at eleven reflects that we do not believe our parents require the full period)
- For other relatives (spouse, sibling, child): Thirty days — the shloshim period
- On the yahrzeit (anniversary of passing): Kaddish is recited annually on the Hebrew date of death
Q: Why does Kaddish have no mention of death?
The Kaddish's silence on death is intentional and profound. The rabbis taught that even in the depths of grief, our response to loss should be the affirmation of God's greatness. This is not denial — it is defiance. "Despite everything, I praise You."
It echoes the reaction of the great sages who, even upon hearing tragic news, pronounced: *Baruch Dayan HaEmet* — "Blessed is the True Judge."
Q: What if there is no son to say Kaddish?
Families without a son to say Kaddish have several options:
- A daughter may recite Kaddish (widely accepted today)
- Another family member (nephew, cousin) may volunteer
- The family can hire a scholar to say Kaddish on behalf of the deceased
- Local synagogues can arrange for a dedicated minyan to say Kaddish daily
For further reading on Jewish mourning practices, visit [Chabad.org's guide to Shivah Mourning](https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/342063/jewish/Shivah-Mourning.htm).